Parenthood changes you, that’s no surprise. Here are some of the things I DIDN’T see coming:
1. Pride – obviously I knew I would feel proud of my children’s achievements but never did I expect to find myself whooping like I’d won the lottery in response to a poo in the potty or an independently-adorned pair of tights (happened this morning. I could have wept).
2. Body beautiful – as much as I have issues with my body, there will always be a sense of achievement underlying all of those bugbears – I grew two human beings. From scratch. How awesome is that?!
3. Clashes – there’s something about your own offspring and their amazing ability to push your buttons like no-one else can.
4. Judgement – ‘parenting is one of the hardest things to do and one of the easiest things to have an opinion on’ – Never a truer word spoken.
5. Sacrifice – I’d give my right arm for my girls to be happy. I’m not so sure about the last slice of chocolate cake though… I guess some things never change?
6. Fear – pre-kids I was scared of the usual stuff, you know, spiders, the dark (yes, I’m 32), axe murderers, etc. Now you can add to that list: slides, roads, strangers, stairs, grapes, knives, car parks, low-flying birds, the oven, sticky-out bath taps, slippery floors… Oh the list is endless.
7. Superpowers – Rose is afraid of loud hand driers. Unless she holds on to my leg while they are on. I don’t know why it makes her feel brave, it just does, and it makes me feel pretty amazing too. Well done, leg. Oh, and it has to be my right leg, the left one just isn’t as good.
8. Reliance – I need my Mummy friends as much as I need my Saturday evening chocolate fix – probably more in fact.
9. Laughter – there is nothing more hilarious than a toddler. Nothing.
10. Dependence – The moment our first baby popped out (OK, she didn’t exactly ‘pop’ out) I suddenly became important. She needs me. It matters that I’m here for her. Sometimes only Mummy will do. It’s a HUGE responsibility, but an incredible, all-consuming one and I wouldn’t change it for the world.